An Experience

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Sat, 17/12/2011 - 16:58
Michelle
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A fundamental element of the Fully-Recovered Michelle I am working on becoming is reality of experience.

Life is nothing if I am not there in it. It doesn't matter where I go, who I meet, what my plans are or what I challenge myself to do, I may as well be unconscious in bed if I am not in a frame of mind that allows me to really BE where I am, with the person/people I'm with, doing what I'm doing, hearing what's to be heard and seeing what's to be seen.

I went to Imelda May's O2 gig last night with my best friend. I have a best friend. I have taste (damn good taste!) in music. I have the self-worth to buy tickets to see someone I admire, live in concert.

This was our Christmas present to each other, and it was just the best present I could have imagined at this time. Imelda May, for anyone not too familiar with her work, is a super singer/song-writer from Dublin. She sings a mixture of blues and rockabilly, and she rocked every song she sang last night. I love the fact that you're listening to her sing about her life when she's doing one of her own numbers. From her best friend, to her husband, to her family, to herself, her music is full of her life.

And her performance is full of herself- her body and her soul.

IT IS THIS FULLNESS OF BEING - THE FULLNESS WITH WHICH she EXPERIENCES THE GIG - that allows the audience to feel and breathe and love her performance so much. She uses her face, her arms, her hips to move with the rhythm and the words, no matter what the song. And I was there, enjoying it to the full and knowing I would remember this brilliant Christmas gift for a long time.

I was tired. I've had a shockin' busy two weeks. I've felt stressed out by a work situation and other temporary factors in my work setting, and I've grown frustrated at not enjoying the festive season as much as I'd like. But, around Christmas, there are plenty of people who can say the same. And not everyone is lucky enough to go to a gig with a wonderful friend to listen and dance to their favourite singer perform with Bono (yes, Bono came onto the stage for two songs!) and Mary Black (Imelda and Mary singing "Silent Night" to end the show - what could be better for Christmas cheer?).

So, I am so pleased that I wasn't half-there; that I could really feel the music and enjoy the whole show, and just say to myself "She's brilliant." She is. She's a role-model of the truest, most healthy kind.

And when you allow yourself to be engulfed by an experience like that, you know there is more to life than the mistaken values you've lived with. You know that there is an awful lot to be happy about in this world. You believe the words of Mary Oliver that shrinking ourselves makes no one else feel bigger; does no good; that we can help others shine by letting our light shine.

Today, I am thankful for the shining lights of the world, for the freedom I have to experience their talent, and for the inspiration I am now able to take from their lives. I too can be a role-model, on my own terms, and in the meantime, I can just enjoy the show. Thank God.

Grá iontach mór, an Nollaig seo,
Michelle x

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Sun, 18/12/2011 - 18:11
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Michelle
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Another one..:)

I went to a 'Come Dine With Me, Not ED' workshop this morning. It was another example of quality of experience.
It did take more effort than Friday night - there's no point being false - to refrain from keeping track of time and from thinking back or ahead. But I still managed to stay where I was, in the room, with the lovely people i was with, in the moment, listening to the helpful information given, smelling and tasting the nourishing foods being introduced.
I was there, of my own free will, for myself. And the whole is worth more than the sum of it's parts.
I got more out of the COMBINATION of looking at, hearing about, and trying out the food preparation and cooking techniques, plus the contributions and questions of others attending, plus their responses to what I contributed, plus challenging fears around certain foods, plus observing my own feelings about the situation and remaining there in both mind and body, in spite of the more negative feelings, plus the novelty of leaving with a few lovely, nutritious treats to polish off tomorrow(:P) than I would have got out of any of those individual factors alone.

The whole experience was so so worthwhile.

I promise myself I will experience using what I learned today in the coming week and henceforth, and experience how easy and natural it becomes.

I think i've used the word 'experience' enough - you get the message!

Good luck in all your experiences, especially this week. I know there can be challenging ones to face at this time of year. But do try and make the most of them. I will if you will!

All the best,
Michelle xx

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